We all want to feel more balanced and more calm. But are we really ready to do what it takes?
Calmness doesn’t just show up at your door. It doesn’t invite itself in. To be frank, if calm did come knocking, you probably wouldn’t notice it due to all the mind-noise.
Mind-noise is not a you problem. It is a human problem.
Our thinking mind is created to solve problems. The mind depends on the nervous system’s assessment of threat and safety to determine what is problematic and what is not. Unfortunately, the nervous system’s assessment of such things is as old as humanity. Once upon a time, the threat of a ferocious animal attack was real. Not so much anymore. Yet, the fight, flight, freeze survival responses are what continue to inform our thinking mind’s action.
Any discomfort we feel can be assessed by the nervous system as a threat, leading the thinking mind to solve the issue of discomfort. Now, the mind can not always solve how we feel. It can help us understand our feelings, but sometimes feelings need to run their course and we need to provide them the space to do so.
To provide space, we need the capacity and tolerance to be with discomfort. Once we have this, we can begin to disrupt the automatic problem-solving pattern of the thinking mind when discomfort is present. With practice, this slowly begins to quiet the mind’s noise.
Inner calm is within us all. It is the automatic-survival relationship between the nervous system’s assessment of threat and the thinking mind’s job to fix it that needs to be disrupted and changed so there is space for calm to exist and grow.
Let’s disrupt this relationship to make space for a new one!
5 Ways to Find More Inner Calm
1. Acceptance. Acceptance is critical for peace of mind. Accepting that uncertainty, work, and change are facts of life can be a huge leap towards inner calm. This and differentiating between what you can control and what you can not control, will quiet most of the thinking-mind’s noise.
2. Meditate. Meditation is about mental silence and observing all that occurs within. This doesn’t have to be done in one sitting. Meditation is about being mindful, present in each moment, a muscle that can be developed over time. Place reminders around you to remind you to stop, observe, and breathe. In this way, you foster your relationship with presence, observer, and your breath.
3. Nature. Our nervous system takes in a different vibration from nature. Somehow nature can directly impact our nervous system, inviting a greater sense of safety, which then allows space for calm. Find ways that you can spend time with nature and observe what happens inside.
4. Sleep. If our nervous system is influencing our thinking-mind, then we really need to take care of those things that impact our nervous system. One major factor is sleep. Sleep allows our body’s natural healing process to take place. Without sleep, we feel more frazzled and irritable. Take some time to prioritize your sleep routine.
5. Take a Break from Social Media. Another part of our thinking-mind’s job is to compare things so it can make sense of things. Given this, social media is a great place for the mind to work overtime in comparing. A sure way to unsettle you instead of calm you. Take a conscious break from social media every day and notice what happens inside.
Inner calm doesn’t just show up, you must make space for it by changing your relationship with the noise. Use these 5 tips for Inner Calm and watch your relationship shift with yourself, with others, and with the world around you.
The Simply Counselling Team